From ‘HeWhoWasn’tThere’ Match Report. Brighton V Wigan

HeWhoWasn’tThere .. Match Report .. Brighton v Wigan

After I called into Bree Louise and had a curry in Drummond street before the FA cup semi final and we won that match I always follow the same superstitious ritual every time I go to London. Ita’s not because I like beer or south Indian curries, I hate them (yeah right). Titanic and Ebony were our winning beers, so I always have them if they are on and then anything else that is appropriate. Dirty Tackle was good but the Plum Porter is the best.

I would have loved to have carried onwards to Brighton, but having been to Iceland to see the lights and then Cardiff to see our gallant march on to Wembley again (soon it’ll get tiresome), I was not given and exit visa for another weekend away. She who must be obeyed!!

The stream that Bucharest had told us would work, wasna’t flowing. The BBC and the txt updates from Orrelllatic were more reliable although I was a bit worried about his mental state when I txtd and asked how much extra time ‘Mc25McMinutes’ was the reply. Even the Championship refs hate us. By the way … where does extra time come from? It just seems as if every time Wigan look as if we might win or they might score … suddenly there is 4 minutes from nowhere added.

Anyway, from reviewer ‘Hewhowasn’there’, the game got off to a promising start. There was a big crowd out in glorious sunshine. Ali who hates Bolton was at his best again, making some fine saves. Uwe, in who we trust, has told the boys to ‘shoot when you get a sight of goal. You never know, it may go in and we may be lucky with a deflection’. So after 20 minutes McCarthur took a thumping shot and the 700 McWigan fans went delirious. Yup, in Who We Trust … it had gone in. The days of passing 743 times until it was in the 6 yard box and then another 23 passes before a shot are nearly over.

Half time came with the standard 2 minutes extra time. As at Cardiff, the travelling fans were letting Lord Whelan and Sir McBen know that they were in town.

Second half to follow …

Brighton started the 2nd half with added determination with ClassActMcRamis controlling the defence and calming the anxieties.

McMaynard had a shot and then we got a corner from which Mcann thumped a McBoyce like header from 20 yards in to the top left corner. The sun was out, McWigan were 2 up and 1 place off the play offs. Things were looking good. Then to liven things up Brighton were gifted a goal. McJordi and McEspi were on defending wave after wave of attack. McAli again imagined he was against Bolton and played a blinder. Of course 10 minutes was extended by 5 just incase the ref could contrive a goal for Brighton.

But it wasn’t to be. McWigan won. McWaghorn looks good.  McAli decided it would look cool to play the game out in slow motion, at times ….. very slow motion, but there is only a limited amount of time you can think about a goal kick!!

And every one was exhausted; worn out by expending so much emotional energy.

All the stats were against us … but there is only 1 stat that counts!!

We’re all in it together, and the Ebony Plum Porter at Bree Louise tasted especially good.

I wish I’d been there!!



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